“Some people really stepped up.” That’s what a friend of mine said when I asked him how things went when he returned to work after a month of medical leave. The look on his face and the tone of his voice said the rest, “. . . and some people didn’t.” It is a common theme of discussion in my executive leadership coaching practice. I hear it from most leaders I talk with. Some people step up, and some people do not. It is often surprising who does and who doesn’t. We are thrilled by the unexpected leadership shown by those who rise to the occasion, and we can be so disappointed by people who fail to meet our expectations. The former can be gratifying, but the latter can shake our confidence as leaders.
“Words Matter.” Those words were scrawled across the commentary section my local paper, The Richmond Times-Dispatch. This article was about the tendency of government entities to use confusing language and the danger this tendency carries. While I appreciated the article, the headline got me thinking about other language-related problems. Language is particularly important in the field of executive leadership. In my coaching practice, many of the biggest challenges my clients face stem from imprecise language, yet most of us rarely think about the words we use.
“It’s not supposed to be fun. That’s why they call it work.” That was my father’s attempt at humor whenever I complained about chores around the house. I know he was only kidding, but for many people, this is how they truly feel. It’s work, so it is supposed to be hard and unpleasant. The idea that work could be fun is almost counter-cultural. Several years ago, in spite of what my father said, I came to the realization that work not only can be fun, it should be. That doesn’t mean that we will always love every aspect of our work, but I believe we are doing ourselves a real disservice if we don’t strive to find employment that is fulfilling and enjoyable. This new way of looking at work was a primary driver behind my decision to leave the relative security of my corporate life for the uncertainty of entrepreneurship.
In my last post I wrote about the importance of knowing when to break the rules and the leadership it takes to help others do so. Today, I want to focus on how our actions (or inaction) can lead others to behave inappropriately. Without knowing or intending to, our actions may lead people astray. Our behaviors may give people the impression that the rules do not apply to them. Our actions may even make them believe that they have our tacit approval to break rules or even break laws. Our failure to react to one misdeed may give them the impression that we will ignore others. As leaders, we must recognize that our behaviors and choices send messages for others to interpret, and if we are not careful, they may lead to disaster or tragedy.
Some rules are made to be broken. It’s true, but the real challenge is figuring out which ones they are and what it means to break them. Some are easy. Last week, an extraordinary rule breaker celebrated his 94 birthday. Nelson Mandela’s willingness to defy his government to oppose Apartheid changed a nation and made him an international symbol for transformation and reconciliation. Mandela’s life has taught us that breaking rules and paying the price for doing so can raise awareness to issues that must be addressed. Whether you are trying to change the world or just change your family, deciding to break rules takes selflessness, courage, and wisdom. Most of all it takes a willingness to lead.
Testimonials
I've invited Doug to speak several times at our university and will continued to enjoy doing so. Both students and faculty members love Doug's humility, his comfortable and highly interactive manner, and willingness to share both painful and successful experiences. He comes across as wise yet without a trace of arrogance. I think students almost instantly view him as the type of person they'd like to have as a mentor. I’m confident that those who apply the wisdom he shares will be introduced to new and practical ways of improving their leadership.
Ph.D., Director, Gilliam Center for Free Enterprise and Ethical Leadership and Professor, Management Department, College of Business, James Madison University
I've invited Doug to speak several times at our university and will continued to enjoy doing so. Both students and faculty members love Doug's humility, his comfortable and highly interactive manner, and willingness to share both painful and successful experiences. He comes across as wise yet without a trace of arrogance. I think students almost instantly view him as the type of person they'd like to have as a mentor. I’m confident that those who apply the wisdom he shares will be introduced to new and practical ways of improving their leadership.
Ph.D., Director, Gilliam Center for Free Enterprise and Ethical Leadership and Professor, Management Department, College of Business, James Madison University
Bringing years of personal experience in leadership in Fortune 500 companies, Doug's presentation is based on his Book "If You Will Lead." Doug's program was much more than a “motivational” sales seminar. It was an inspirational and energizing session that provided us with the tools and insights to lead more powerfully and sell more effectively.
President, AAISP – DC
Doug Moran’s opening keynote address to our annual conference set the tone for the entire event. It was my hope that we would have a speaker who would inspire and encourage our attendees to think and act more boldly about the topic of sustainable mobility, and Doug delivered exactly what we needed. Most importantly, he provided us with concrete leadership advice that we can use to drive positive change. His provocative and challenging words were repeated by many of our other presenters who integrated his leadership messages into their speeches and discussions.
P.Eng., President ACT Canada
Doug Moran looks at the practice of leadership from a unique perspective - through the lens of a literary classic. It’s a fascinating way for today’s managers to think about their own leadership brand.
President, Arneson Leadership Consulting
(Steve was named one of the country's Top 100 thought leaders on leadership in 2008, 2009 and 2010, and one of the Top 25 leadership coaches in America for 2008, 2009 and 2010 by Leadership Excellence magazine. )
Although the problems we confront have changed, the fundamentals of leadership remain the same. Recognizing this enduring truth, Doug Moran has created a book that draws leadership lessons from some of history’s greatest figures. If You Will Lead surely will help readers become better leaders.
Former Governor and Senator, Commonwealth of Virginia
Few people are born leaders. The rest of us need a guide to help us gain both the courage and competency to lead well. Doug Moran’s book provides a perfect blend of a thoughtful leadership framework and anecdotes from some of history’s greatest leaders to help make his points come to life. If You Will Lead is a great companion for any aspiring executive.
EVP and CFO, Intersections, Inc.
I was particularly impressed with the section of the book about Jim Mulligan and the role of leading with stamina. It is an outstanding representation of one of the toughest men to endure the Hanoi Hilton. His leadership kept us young guys going. This book captures the importance of leadership stamina.
(USN ret.), former POW
In IF YOU WILL LEAD, Doug Moran provides keen insights on leadership while drawing lessons from some of history’s great leaders. Moran has taken a complex and challenging subject and created lessons and a framework that can help leaders realize and leverage their strengths.
President, Financial Services, Capital One
As I was reading If You Will Lead, I was reminded of Santayana’s famous quote, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” This book offers the opportunity to learn from some of history’s greatest leaders, so we can replicate their success. Moran's masterful framework translates these historical lessons into a concrete and practical guide for today's leaders.
CEO, Korea Exchange Bank
Doug Moran’s humane and insightful study reminds us of some of the timeless qualities great leaders need. And even if leaders sometimes have to “govern in prose”, drawing inspiration from poetry is a fine idea.
formerly management columnist at the FT, now Visiting Professor at the Cass Business School, London, and director of strategy at Edelman in the UK
Doug Moran did a great job of tying essential leadership attributes to great, recognizable leaders. The attributes chosen are essential traits of good leadership and very well organized.
former Commanding Officer, USS Dwight D. Eisenhower, CVN-69, and recipient of the John Paul Jones 'Inspirational Leadership Award' from the Navy League of the US.
This is an engaging primer for anyone committed to becoming a leader at work or in life. Using compelling examples, Doug Moran has provided a valuable series of leadership lessons that are relevant and useful to all of us. This book will make a difference to you and to all who look to you for leadership.
Professor Emeritus, Darden Graduate School of Business, University of Virginia
Doug Moran’s book will motivate leaders at all level to strengthen key leadership traits of character, authenticity, integrity and self-efficacy. You will learn tangible leadership techniques and walk along side some of history’s best known figures from Lincoln to Mandela, making this a truly inspirational book.
Co-author Anytime Coaching: Unleashing Employee Performance Adjunct Professor, Johns Hopkins Carey Graduate School of Business
I highly add my name of recommendation to the book by Doug Moran entitled If You Will Lead. "One of the great needs in our country and in our world is the need for capable and inspiring leadership. There is, in my judgment, an absence of good leadership as we hear each day of the incessant wrangling among elected officials. We certainly need some new leaders to come forward. This book gives the reader a sense of the qualities of leadership which are so needed today. Leadership is an innate quality. It certainly can be acquired, as long as we have examples which this book gives to emulate." "In my judgment this book is most worthwhile and sorely needed in our world today.
Bishop Emeritus of Richmond
This is an engaging primer for anyone committed to becoming a leader at work or in life. Using compelling examples, Doug Moran has provided a valuable series of leadership lessons that are relevant and useful to all of us. This book will make a difference to you and to all who look to you for leadership.
Professor Emeritus, Darden Graduate School of Business, University of Virginia.
I was introduced to “IF” at a young age by my mom, and it is a poem that I keep in my mind at all times as I try to do my job to the very best of my ability here at Butler. Many of the positive lessons in the poem have been very applicable for me. It’s a terrific poem to study for those that aspire to be in a position of leadership.
Head Coach, Butler University Men’s Basketball Team
“If You will Lead” brings real insight into the qualities needed for successful leadership. This book is exceptionally well written and provides a true guideline into all aspects that challenge true leadership. Inspiring balanced and well thought out it is a major contribution for those who would lead in our fast changing society.
At a time when leadership in the world is at such a low ebb – “If You Will Lead” will make a tremendous contribution to the upcoming generation!
After 26 years on Wall Street, the last 20 of them leading people, I am more aware than ever of the need to level-set your actions and philosophies and always be adjusting to the fast-paced world we live in where change is the only constant. Doug Moran has proven himself to be a forward-thinking leader and insightful assessor of practical practices in an increasingly complex and competitive business environment, having demonstrated a track record of creative and strategic thinking along with successful tactical execution in both the public and private sectors across multiple leadership roles. As one fights off the temptation to become jaded and dismissive of those offering the latest recipe for leadership success, Doug has proven to be one of the few people whose opinions I seek out proactively, knowing that I can count on candid feedback, spirited debate and a collaborative partner when dealing with issues important to me both personally and professionally. If You Will Lead is an important addition to any leader’s short list of practical business reading and will make an immediate positive impact on how one ties effective leadership principles to the future success of their organization.
Managing Director, Merrill Lynch Wealth Management
Doug's book on leadership is a standout. Based on Kipling's poem, "If," the book is thoughtful and comprehensive, pragmatic and inspiring, and grounded in self awareness, which is the fundamental requirement for leadership excellence. This book, with its well-drawn examples of leadership attributes, is in itself a courageous act of leadership. Serious leaders interested in transformation for themselves or their organizations ought to savor it, journal with it, and refer to it often as a way to calibrate, contribute, and create results that matter.
Author of Be Your Own Coach, and On Becoming a Leadership Coach, and creator of the Georgetown University Leadership Coaching Program